Disabled Sex Activities And Intimacy – Making Love Work For You
If you’re disabled sex activities can bring unique challenges, but they can also reward you and your partner with much-wanted intimacy and pleasure. Forget those Stone Age beliefs that people with disabilities aren’t interested in or capable of lovemaking.
A 2005 Disability Now newspaper survey of over 1,100 disabled people in the UK found that 84.7% had had sexual intercourse and 27.8% regularly enjoy lovemaking. Yet 86% - split nearly equally between men and women - said they are physically disabled or chronically ill. So put those myths to bed. If you’re facing physical challenges, you can embrace disabled sex activities…here’s some ideas to make love work for you.
Ask, ask, ask
Ten years ago, getting useful details about disabled sex techniques and activities
meant a trip to the bookstore, or if you were lucky, a discussion with a healthcare person who could tell you what you wanted to know.
Now, an Internet search will guide you to numerous sites that give info and inspiration. One example is www.outsiders.org.uk/leaflets, which provides several pages of info. Books, too, remain an excellent resource. So corral your questions and start your research. The info you want is out there.
Talk, talk, talk
disabled sex intimacy,
it’s vital to talk to your partner so he/she grasps the uniqueness of having sex with you. Let them know your abilities, your limitations and techniques to pursue activities that work for both of you. Maybe you have hand mobility issues, but your mouth works just fine. Maybe intercourse is impossible laying down, but doing it sitting up works well. Communicate to stimulate – that is key.
But even before talking to your bed mate, talk to other people who understand your situation. The Disability Now survey noted that 93% of respondents who had no one to talk to about their sexuality had poor body image and sexual self-esteem. “But we found that sexual self-esteem improved considerably if they had someone to talk to,” noted the paper.
Talk to kindred spirits who can share their experiences and ideas, and/or seek out organizations or professionals who can boost your knowledge.
Try, try, try
Sex usually involves more than intercourse. The range of activities is endless – from manual stimulation to oral sex to sex toy play. To find out where you fall on this spectrum, try, try and try again! That’s how you’ll learn whether propping yourself or your partner on pillows makes penetration more comfortable.
Explore which sex toys (like vibrators or dildos) you can manipulate by hand for solo or mutual play. Testing out different positions for oral sex will help you find the best way to support your head and neck.
By getting information, talking things out and experimenting to find what works best, you can maximize sexual pleasure for both you and you partner.